Saturday, January 25, 2014

What is More Important- Work or School?

Today's question of the week comes from a 19 year old mom of a 17 month old little boy. She asks:

I am currently going to college full time and working part time as a hostess at a restaurant.  I am so tired and feel like I never see my kid.  Something has to change so I don't know what to do. Should I give up school or work?~ Jenni S.

Thanks for writing in, Jenni.  I know just how you feel.  I started college when I was 19 and had two little boys.  I also worked part time.  And juggling all of that is hard with a capital H. I admire your desire to continue your education because, in the long run, you and your son will benefit from that choice. 

You did say that you are in college full time.  Have you considered taking a part-time course load to give you more time with your son and more time to sleep?  I know that part-time decreases the amount of financial aid and makes graduation seem further away but it is something to consider.

I don't want to advise you to quit your job, particularly if you are the sole breadwinner for your child. Now, if you live with your parents or your baby's dad, then that is a conversation that needs to take place with them. 

If you end up keeping the schedule you have now, I want you to remember a few things.  First of all, school is not a permanent situation.  You may be making a sacrifice of time with your son in the short term for something that will benefit both of you in the long run.  Secondly, the quality of the time you spend with your child is far more important than the quantity.  Try to set up a time once or twice a week that you and your son can spend time together without any distractions or interferences.

All that being said, it's okay to say "now is not the time for school".  Only you know what will work best for your life and your particular situation.  I encourage you to pray, talk to a supportive adult in your life and consider all your options before making a final decision.

--Do you have a question you want me to answer about being a teen mom?  Email it to me at and I may choose your question to be featured here.  I do respond to every email I receive, even if I choose not to publish the question so please feel free to reach out to me anytime.

Till tomorrow,

The information contained within this web site or within coaching sessions, classes, or workshops, is not a substitute for professional advice such as from a Medical Doctor, Psychiatrist, counselor or therapist of any kind. The information provided by Teen Mom 365 or Melissa Smallwood does not constitute legal or medical professional advice nor is it intended to constitute such advice.  Any decisions you make, and the consequences thereof are your own.

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